Brighton and Smithfiled split, Hogs now 7-7

Game 1 against the Bengals, I throw Castillo and his 11.37 era. He leaves the game with an even higher era. Enter Washburn in relief, and his 10.29 era. He too would leave the game later with an even higher era. This is like 2004 all over again for my pitching-heavy drafted team that can’t pitch. Fryman did much of the damage against me, with his 4 hits including 2 bombs. They pasted me 12-6.

Game 2, Hudson starts for me (like he does nearly every game) and doesn’t last through the 3rd inning, giving up 6 hits and 3 walks that quickly. He got tagged for 4 runs, although only 1 was earned. My 3-0 lead early turned into a 4-3 deficit in the blink of an eye mostly due to a Polanco error. The game was tied at 5-5 going into the 8th, when Valentin hit a grand slam after they intentionally walked McGwire to load the bases. Little does the computer know that in this league, Valentin is much more potent than Big Mac. For good measure, Everett hit a grand slam in the 9th as well, as I win running away with it, 14-5. Everett collects 7 RBI and 2 dingers in the rout. My bullpen really comes through, pitching 6.1 innings of 1-run ball. It felt good like pastrami and beef.

Game 2 of Hogs-Hairys series goes to Jerry

Don’t let the final 12-3 final score fool you. The game was MUCH closer than that for most of the night and only after weaseling out of several scary situations with the tying run at the plate or worse did the Hairys pull away in the final inning.

This game was great on so many levels – from a morale stand-point, this was one that the Hairys needed desperately after getting all-out throttled in every facet of the game in Game 1. And from an entertainment stand-point, this was about as good as a PTP game can get. Behold:
Charles Johnson was injured for this game only
Rick Aguilera was injured for this game and 8 more days
Rafael Furcal was injured for this game and 2 more days
Mike Sirotka was injured for this game and 3 more days
Carl Everett was injured for this game only
Scott Rolen was ejected from this game
Tony McKnight was ejected from this game
John Franco was ejected from this game

That’s EIGHT players forcibly removed from the game via injury or ejection. Holy crap. Here’s how it went down. The Hairys got out to an early 1-0 lead thanks to Furcal’s single and swipe, No-mah’s sac and the Hurt’s single. But who cares – the Hairys led 1-0 in Game 1 as well and look how that thing ended. The bottom half of the 1st was an indication that this game was going to be out of the ordinary as weird plays abounded. Rolen drops a grounder then picks it up and makes a terrible throw, but still gets the out at 1st. Sheff K’s, but the ball rolls loose and he is barely nipped at first – then Mac launches one to center that “sounded good”, but comes up on the track. Thank goodness. The Hairys repeat their 1st inning fortunes as Ochoa singles/swipes and is brought in by a single from maniac Stynes. 2-0 Hairys. It was 4-0 after Charles Johnson wrapped a 2-run bomb around the foul pole for his 6th homer of the year. In the meantime, The Rocket was firing on all cylinders as he retired 11 of the first 12 batters he faced before giving up an RBI single to Grebek.

So, it’s 4-1 as we head to the 6th. Charles Johnson draws a lead-off walk off of Hog starter McKnight. Then, all hell breaks loose. Bri, I need you to teach me how to save the play-by-play dialogue boxes because this one was a BEAUT. I swear it was like 3 pages long. With this new patch, the pbp seems to have taken on a definite increase in flair, sass and verve and it was KILLING IT last night in Game 2. So anyway, Rolen gets drilled. He hobbles around, dusts himself and just when you thought all was well, he gets pissed, charges the mound and it is ON. Rolen and McKnight each land some blows and are ejected. Charles Johnson charges in from 1st but is cheap-shotted from behind by roid-rage’d Mac and is injured. Crazy Carl Everett comes racing in from center field whooping like Geronimo, but gets clubbed in the knee by Hairys bat-boy Travis – HE’s done for the day. And then, just when it appeared the scrum couldn’t get any worse, pussy-willow pitchers Sirotka and Aguilera lead the charges out of their respective pens, but each trips and gets trampled by their own squad. Sirotka gone for this one +3 and Aguilera this one +8. That’s right – EIGHT – when I first saw that I figured dude must have got himself shiv’d in that melee. Easily the worst injury in ptp history. Good thing he sucks balls and I won’t miss him a bit. Chaos eventually returns to order and Ted and Jerry are left with mouths agape and holes in their lineup to fill. Stynes is responsible for the only scoring after the war with another RBI single. Furcal lines out to 2nd and somehow injures himself for another 2 days in the process. That’s ELEVEN days worth of injuries for Ockey in one half inning of absolute MAYHEM. And it was glorious.

Things continue to be oh-so-weird as Big Mac steals a base (wtf?) in the 6th and then in the 7th, Polanco and Ortiz (who each had like 17 hits in the series) start a rally that results in a run scored and the bases loaded with Big Mac up again and a 5-2 score. Clemens has walked 2 straight batters and Ockey is straight crapping himself as launches one to center. But again, it is a few feet short and all is well. The Hairys go in order meekly in the top of the 8th and the Hogs threaten AGAIN in the bottom as Clemens is chased and the Hogs have the tying run at the plate in the form of Burkhart. Thankfully, he does NOT K, but instead grounds into an inning-ending GDP.

The Hairys want some insurance at this point and boy do they get it as they send 12 men to the plate in the 9th and drop a 7-spot on the Hog relievers. Who else but Stynes starts it with a double (to boost his avg back up to a ridiculous .558). Ozzie Timmons, playing for the injured Furcal, lobbies for more playing time and will get it as he goes 2-2 with a bomb and 4 RBI IN THE INNING. As the top of the frame comes to a close, we get probably the funniest PBP I’ve ever seen – something to the effect of “Well, after sending 12 men to the plate, it is FINALLY over. I don’t know how many RBI’s they had or who got them – my scorecard’s a mess. What I DO know is that it is now 12-2 for Gary.” Simply hilarious. The Hogs get another run to make it 12-3 and at last it is over and a classic game is added to ptp history.

Breakers Fall Short With Split of Crows.


 Game 1:

Caminiti hits another bomb, his 7th in 33 ABs.

Ellis Burks gets dumped to the 9 hole and decides to hit for the cycle.  He is the 3rd player to do it.  How come only my players hit for he cycle. 

Things are going great, the Crows are getting absolutely pummeled then they decide to go all Breakers on me and score 7 in the 8th, Kim comes in to give up his usual grand slam and the Crows come from being down 9-3 to winning 12-9.

Game 2:

Crows get pummeled again, but this time instead of using Kim in relief I decided to start him and he cowboy’s up striking out 10 in 5 innings and allowing only 3 runs.

Barry Larkin had a great series, blasting 3 out and Will Clark continues to defy all things with his .561/.647/.927 numbers.

Caminiti has 7 HRs and 23 RBIs after 10 games.

As a team the Breakers have hit 34 HRs in 394 ABs.  We have scored 102 runs.  That is an average of 10.2 runs/game.  As a team our slash numbers are .365/.433/.703.

As a league we are averaging 4.8 HRs/game.

Game 1 of Hogs-Hairys series goes to Ted

Man it feels good sometimes just to win an easy one. Just to blow the other guy out, you know? A 13-5 Hog win over the Hairys gave Tim Hudson his 1st win, and Karren a sigh of relief following the win against the perennial powerhouse team from Gary, Indiana. McGwire, Hidalgo, and pr power rating Grebeck all hit homers off Hairy relievers, but the real damage was done in the first inning as Hairy starter Chen needed 52 pitches to get out of the inning. He pitched to 11 Smithfield batters, allowing 5 hits, 3 walks, and 6 runs in that 1st. Hudson, meanwhile, pitched well enough to win, allowing 4 runs in nearly 6 IP. Hog Barcelo got a save after throwing 3.1 innings of 1 hit ball. The numbers 8 and 9 hitters in the Smithfield lineup, Hector Ortiz and Placido Polanco, each banged out 4 hits in the game. Ortiz raised his average to .696. I’ll let Jerry tell the story of game 2, because, honestly, he killed me.

Rolen’s Salami’s Help Hairys Sweep Scorps

The Gary Hairys ventured outside of their own division for the first time Tuesday night to play the visiting Scorpions of Scottsdale. Game 1 was a typical 2019 affair with 23 total runs scored. This one was all about WALKS. Between the 2 teams, an amazing nineteen walks were passed out. Hairy starter Jaret Wright only gave up one hit in 5.1 innings, but his 5 walks were the reason he got touched for 3 runs. The Hairys jumped out to an early 3-0 lead as The Big Hurt and Delgado went back-to-back yak. It was awesome. Scorp Dempster was NOT awesome – particularly in the 2nd when he gave up a lead-off single and then walked the next 3 batters in succession. A 2-run double by Edmonds made it 6-2 in the 3rd and in the 6th Edmonds led off with a walk and that was it for Wright. Sadly, Fetters came on in relief and was really bad. He continued the trend of the day by walking the first 2 batters he faced to load the bases with no out and after an RBI ground-out by Justice, Hairy nemesis Glaus hit a 3-run tater to tie the game and exacerbate Ockey’s ulcer something fierce. Thank goodness the bottom of that inning was so glorious. Who started it all but Stynes, who went 2-4 to DROP his average to a passable .606. Stynes singled, then Furcal bunted for a single. No-mah walked to load the bases and Hurt hit a sac fly to give the Hairys their lead back. Delgado walked to re-load the bases and after a Charles Johnson K, things were grim. That’s when Scott Rolen decided to take over as he cranked a massive grand salami deep to right to give the Hairys an 11-6 cushion they would not relinquish – 13-10 Hairys in the end.

Scott Rolen then decided to get the 2nd game started off on the right foot as well. Walks again killed Scorp pitching as starter Brian Anderson walked the bases loaded for Rolen who, again, stepped up to the deli counter and said “Yeah, I’ll take the freaking huge salami you’ve got there.” Two grand slams in 3 at bats. That’s pretty sick, no? I’m really proud of Scott Rolen right now. The 2nd inning started off awesome too as Stynes walked AGAIN and No-mah went yard for a 6-0 Hairy lead. That would be enough for starter Wolf and the pen – barely. Bagwell homered twice and the Scorps cut it to 6-4 with the tying run at the plate, but Fultz got a couple outs to weasel free. Next up, the Hairys are due for their annual thrashing at the hands of the Hedgehogs. Fantastic. On Stynes-watch: Chris goes hitless unfortunately (avg droops to .571), but still walks twice and scores 2 runs to keep up the old OBP. I love this guy.